07/15/99

-----This morning I shall set my concern on the much vaunted turning of the millennium. Of course there are many parts of the world where this is less than imminent because they live in different eras. So it is for the nations of Islam the year 1378, For the Hebrews it is 5750, for the Hindus 4211 and so on. Yet these distinctions are essentially meaningless because most of the world has adopted the Gregorian calendar and the entire cyberocracy is built upon its own double digit interpretation of this form. Hence the entire Y2K ( do I hear an echo?) problem which is not so much a problem as an opportunity for myriads of programmers to squeeze major bucks, for their ununionized asses, from the time crunch.
-----So wouldn't this be a wonderful time to simply start anew, remove the 2 and a couple of zeros, and call it the year 0 with an open template to ad as many #s as will prove necessary ad quandocumquatum. There might even be instituted the International Fixed Calendar or the World Calendar.
-----The IFC posits a year divided into 13 months of 28 days with a stand alone day ideal for an international New Years Celebration and another for leap year which would be ideal for an international Take A Flying Leap Celebration. Also an extra month called Sol would be inserted between June & July. This might strike those in Antarctica as somewhat ironic but Antarcticans tend to have the requisite sense of humor. Every month would begin on Sunday and end on Saturday. The inconvenience to quarterly reports could be solved by taking one month, possibly Sol, and designating that anyone caught working during that month would be shot.
-----The WC is a place to take a wizz. Unless of course you mean the World Calendar which is a scheme to divide the year into quarters of 91 days, 3 months each, the first having 31 days, the others 30. Again New Years would stand alone and leap year would hang out there. But, frankly, I think twelve months are boring.
-----13 months seems to me so much more appropriate to the times we are approaching, what with the burgeoning population, environmental degradation, auto-perpetuating technology, and a general mindset nostalgic for the chimerical 'certainties' of absolutist platitudes. 13 could well prove our lucky number. It has the seeming asymmetry of natural balance and the artificial resonance of a 'chromatic' octave. Why it's even referential to old Jeshua's coven.
-----So, hey folks, instead of just changing to a ponderous 2000 why not go all the way, do something new under the sun, help to truly unite the many yearning characters of this wee oblate spheroid in sharing the very definition of the times that are a'mutatin'.

More paid vacations for all the happy worms!!!
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